Trigger (nervous system activation) in a toxic workplace - tips to manage yourself

Worksheet: Identifying and Managing Triggers in the Workplace

What is a Trigger?

A trigger is something that causes a strong emotional reaction in you. In a toxic workplace, certain behaviours or situations—like your boss dismissing your ideas—can trigger feelings of anger, frustration, or anxiety. Learning to identify and manage these triggers helps you stay in control, so you can respond thoughtfully instead of reacting impulsively.

Step 1: Identifying Your Triggers

Begin by reflecting on what specific behaviours or situations in your workplace set off strong emotions. Write down what comes to mind:

• Think of recent situations: When did you feel the most frustrated or anxious at work? What was happening?

• Who was involved? Were there specific people (like your boss or coworkers) who contributed to this feeling?

• What were you thinking? What thoughts ran through your mind during that moment?

Example Triggers:

• When my boss dismisses my ideas without discussion.

• When I’m interrupted during meetings.

• When I feel excluded from important decisions.

Write down a few specific to you:

Step 2: Recognizing the Signs of Being Triggered

Once you identify your triggers, the next step is recognizing how your body and mind react when they happen. This will help you catch yourself before you react in a way you might regret.

Physical signs of being triggered:

• Churning beginning in stomach

• Tightness in your chest, shoulders, or jaw

• Rapid heartbeat or shallow breathing

• Feeling flushed or hot

Emotional signs of being triggered:

• Rising anger or frustration

• Feeling disrespected or unheard

• Urgency to defend yourself or respond immediately.

Pay attention to your body's signals when you feel triggered. The earlier you catch it, the easier it is to manage.  It is also important to be gentle with yourself as you get used to noticing these things in the moment.  The goal is not to squash things down, the goal is to become aware of what comes up and choose to respond rather than get stuck in reactivity.

Step 3: Managing Your Triggers

Now that you know what your triggers are and how to recognise them.  You continue to expand awareness and also plan how to manage them as they arise.

Here are steps to help you feel in control:

1. Pause: When you feel triggered, take a brief moment to collect yourself before responding.  Take a deep breath.
   Say to yourself: something like “I’m feeling triggered right now, but I can pause before I react.”

2. Breathe: Continue breathing to calm your body. Inhale through your nose for 4 counts, hold for 4 counts, then exhale slowly for 6 counts.

3. Reframe the Situation: Ask yourself:

• Is this situation as urgent or important as it feels right now?

• Is there another way I could view what just happened?

• Do I need to do anything right now?

• How can I respond in a way that protects my well-being?

4. Use a Boundary Phrase: If needed, calmly assert a boundary to protect yourself from further escalation.
   Examples:

• “I hear you, but I need a moment to think this through.”

• “I’m not available for this conversation right now. Let’s schedule a time later.”

Step 4: Reflect and Learn

After you’ve experienced a trigger, take some time to reflect on how you handled it. This will help you improve your response in the future. Ask yourself:

• What was the trigger?
  (e.g., My boss dismissed my idea during a meeting.)

• How did I respond?
  (e.g., I took a breath and asked for a moment to process.)

• What could I do differently next time?
  (e.g., I could pause longer before reacting and use a boundary phrase.)

Write your reflections here:

Step 5: Your Personal Trigger Plan

After you have identified tour triggers, you write a more specific plan, so you have already done the thinking on how to manage them, you just need to recall the plan.

My Trigger Plan:

1. Common Trigger:
   (e.g., When my ideas are dismissed.)

2. Physical and Emotional Signs:
   (e.g., Tension in my chest, frustration building.)

3. My Management Strategy:
   (e.g., Take a deep breath, reframe the situation, and ask for a moment.)

4. Boundary Phrase (if needed):
   (e.g., “I need a minute to process this before I respond.”)

Repeat this process for other common triggers.

Final Thoughts:
Learning to manage your triggers takes practice, but each time you pause, breathe, and choose your response, you’re building emotional resilience. Triggers don’t have to control you—you have the power to manage them. You've got this!